The secret of candlelight and love...

Decades ago, I attended Divinity School and thought I’d become a minister. Turns out, I argued too much with my professors. When I hear Frankie Avalon from Grease singing “Beauty School Drop Out,” to Frenchie, I sing “Divinity School Dropout…” and wonder what does this mean? I love studying different religions and wasn’t able to sit reverently with doctrine that bugged me.

We were in that bizarre in-between-time of Covid and lockdowns. A Temple was hosting a 9 month Zoom class on Reform Judaism. I signed up. 

In one Zoom class, we learned about Shabbat. It’s the Jewish Sabbath celebration that begins at sundown on Friday night and ends an hour after sundown on Saturday. And Shabbat is much, much more. 

In our home, we began following the prescribed actions. On Friday, making soup and bread before sunset. Creating a plate of tasty appetizers. Having a book on the table with prayers that help us remember to be thankful and joyful about being alive and together. And then we’d light two candles….

There’s a secret in sitting with people you love in candlelight.

As the years pass, I am left savoring this lasting treasure in time we found~ a weekly ritual in our home, the celebration of Shabbat. I look forward to it all week. It’s a break from work, worrying, striving. Shabbat is intended to be a delight. 

At sundown on Friday, we light two candles and dedicate time to family, prayer books, music, nature, storytelling and good food. Often, I purchase a flourless chocolate brownie for dessert. A once a week treat. We exhale. Receive. Renew. Rest. Daydream. Dance. The time becomes sacred. Different.

The seas part and something beautiful happens. Again and again. 

I’m a beginner at this practice of Shabbat. To learn how to honor the Sabbath deeply, intentionally, requires focus and intention each week. I continue to struggle to let go of my worries and work. I remind myself again and again, “We’ve done enough,” as we welcome in the Spirit of Peace and Thankfulness. 

Usually, the tasty treats and the conversation transport me to a place of joy. And if I make it to dessert still troubled, chocolate always helps.

I have come to savor the time of sitting in front of two candles asking family members, “How are you?” And taking time to listen. I love the opportunity of eating delicious food and sharing stories from the week. I often grumble about wearing nice clothes, but then feel better when I do. I put on jewelry I never used to wear. I arrange small vases with fresh flowers on the kitchen table and we play great music. Each week, I love stopping and saying thank you for the blessings in our lives. And I try to give myself time to let this thankfulness sink in, long enough that it becomes a gentle smile. 

My offering to you today is this~ it is possible to make your home into a sanctuary. In fact, it’s important. To define a time of peace, gratitude and connection. To say, “I love you” with your eyes and heart to people you love. To breathe. And to wish each other Peace. 

This weekly ritual, I believe, feeds our deepest hunger and fills us with love.

May Peace be with you.

Kathleen